First off, I think my last post came across a lot more pitiful than intended. The truth is, things aren’t always easy. Life overseas is different and can be frustrating—you can’t understand this if the longest you’ve been in a different culture is just a week or two. I’m grateful to have people in my life who know exactly what it’s like and can tell me they’ve been in the same place—that it’s okay. Missions is oftentimes over-romanticized, and it’s comforting to have someone tell you they’ve been in the same place and to remind you of the growth that comes from different seasons in our lives.
This week was really great, as the Lord has shown me that He can use our gifts and talents in so many ways—it’s almost like He’s purposefully gifted each of us in the ways He has, like He put some thought into it. Hmmmm…. =)
In other news….
The screensaver on my computer is a collection of random photos of random things and random people I’ve encountered since graduating high school in 2008. Although I haven’t added many new pictures to this collection over the last year, it is a broad representation of the past four years—concerts, Braves games, friends, food, family, college, CentriKid, mission trips, traveling, even my last Beach Retreat. When the screensaver comes on, I usually close my computer, move the mouse to bring the desktop back, or just don’t pay any attention to it.
That being said, I just spent 20 minutes staring at the screen as the pictures scrolled by. During this time, I was reminded of many of the beautiful places I’ve been and the beautiful people the Lord has put in my life. Some of the faces I still see while some of them I haven’t seen in a long time. This made me realize how often I take moments for granted.
Towards the end of my GEM Program experience this past year, we completed the StrengthsFinder questionnaire. According to this little test, one of my strengths is that I am futuristic. This is so true! I’m always thinking and dreaming about the future, wondering what’s in store. And while having direction and a vision is a good thing, it can also be a bit not so great. Instead of enjoying where God has me in the present, I far too often, get distracted by the future.
Lately, this happens far too often with my being a recent college graduate who doesn’t really know the next step. It’s my prayer that instead of only thinking about the future, I don’t miss out on the here and now. Why worry about tomorrow when today has enough worry of its own? We are but a breath on this earth—I don’t want to miss out on what God has planned and what He is already doing because I was too busy pondering where to step next. Far too often I try to take charge and make plans, plans, plans instead of trusting and resting in the fact that the Lord has a plan that’s far greater than anything I could ever imagine.
I’ve been reading through Acts lately, studying the early church and the first Christians. The other day as I was reading chapter 9, I was struck by verse 31:
So the church throughout all Judea and Galilee and Samaria had peace and was being built up. And walking in the fear of the Lord and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit, it multiplied.
I don’t know where I’ll be in five years or even much further than five weeks from now , but I do know that I want to be “walking in the fear of the Lord and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit”—I want to be resting in the Lord’s will. That is the only place to be in order to see the Kingdom grow and the Great Commission carried out…the only way disciples can be made.